Sunday, January 2, 2011

No Kiss Blogfest


It is No Kiss Blogfest today! Dozens of writers are putting up scenes where there characters come oh so close to that coveted first kiss. Here is mine, a tiny excerpt from my YA contemporary CEDAR

“I don’t know what’s going on, Cedar, but I’m quite sure sitting out here ‘til you freeze isn’t going to help.”

“It’s not freezing, and I ain’t looking for help.”  I turned my back, curling back into the rock and the peaceful sleep I was enjoying.
          
Noah took off his coat, smoothed it over my shoulders, and dug two granola bars out of his back pocket.  “Yeah . . . well whether you want my help or not, it’s pretty obvious you need it.” 
       
I stared at that silver wrapped snack, hungry and desiring every tiny chocolate morsel hidden within.   “No thanks,” I said and gave it back to him.
           
“You don’t like granola bars?”
          
“No I like them.  Just not hungry.”
           
“I thought we were past this.” Noah snagged the granola bar from my hand, consumed half in one enormous bite, and tossed it back at me.  “It’s not charity anymore, its leftovers.  Now eat it.”
         
I toyed with the granola bar, crushing tiny fragments of it between my fingers, never once bringing it to my mouth.
           
He brushed his fingers across the tip of my shoulder, a silent reminder of the glimpse I’d accidently given him into my life.  “What did Tommy do to you?” Noah asked, and I thought about challenging him, questioning him as to why he was so quick to assume it was Tommy.  Sheer exhaustion won out over pride, and I laughed the most pitiful gurgle of emptiness he’d ever heard.
           
“Nothing I didn’t see coming.” I said and leaned over, sought out the softer mat of grass to lay my head on. 
           
The ground was cold and damp, and I fidgeted, tucked my hands underneath my head for insulation. The frost coated lawn cracked as he slid closer and I looked up just as his hand reached the curled edge of my bandage. 
          
“You can’t stay here all night,” he whispered.
             
The muscles in his arm tightened next to me as he braced himself on the ground, and I closed my eyes as he leaned in, felt my breath catch as his soft, gentle lips brushed across my forehead.  I counted every second they lingered there, wondering what, if anything was behind that fleeting kiss.  Was it compassion, a duty to be kind and generous to others or something more . . . something I was supposed to respond to.  I tossed the possibilities around in my mind for a few excruciatingly long minutes before I opened my eyes.  He pulled the collar of his coat up around my neck, and I tried to hide my confusion behind a weak smile as he settled back into the boulder behind us.

7 comments:

  1. Delicious. He's a keeper. "It's not charity anymore, it's leftovers" cracked me up.
    I love the way she counts the seconds his lips linger and wonders what's behind the fleeting kiss. So good.

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  2. Oh, I like him. As soon as he put his coat around her shoulders he won me over! I like how she wondered what the kiss on her forehead could me- it gave him more layers to me. Nice job.

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  3. I loved that line about charity vs leftovers too! This was a very sweet scene-- nicely executed! Her internal confusion is great.

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  4. Wonderful sense of their separate characters, touching and gentle. People to care about. Great stuff!

    :Dom (My No Kiss)

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  5. There are some great little details in here that really just made the scene for me. I liked the bit about the leftovers, too. And the desire for just a morsel of chocolate. The whole scene was so touching.

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  6. What a very touching scene. Excellent job!

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