Mental Disconnect

I seem to have a disconnect lately, one that is driving me absolutely insane.  I have a thousand ideas swimming around my head, all of them vetted and passed by critique partners.  I have narrowed it down to four possibilities and have begun to mentally hammer out the plots for each of them.  Problem is, I can't get the words from my head onto the damn paper.  I have been working on the same two chapters for the same two books for the better part of the weekend.  And you know what -- it still all sucks.

So I am off to play in the dirt.  I will weed the garden, harvest the strawberries and plant the cucumbers.  Perhaps the change in scenery and a bit of fresh air will unlock the words. 

Ohh . . . and here's to hoping I don't get eaten by the big black bear that is lurking in the woods behind my house.  I know, funny because we live on Cape Cod, and there hasn't been a bear sighting here in centuries.  Literally centuries.  Guess the little bugger hoofed it down from Western Mass and swam across the canal only to take up residence in the woods behind MY house.  Fantastic!  Flipping Fantastic!

Writing What You Want vs. Writing What You Should

I was out for drinks last night with a friend of mine.  She went through the standard haven’t-seen-you-in-a-while litany of questions – How’s was your vacation? What are your plans for the summer?  Have you read Fifty Shades of Grey?   You know – all the stuff girlfriends talk about. Then she hit me with the big one: “What are you going to write for me next?”  I found myself speechless, staring at her as my mind drew a blank.  She laughed, citing how she found it amusing that had no problem talking about the indecencies of one Christian Grey, but when asked a run-of-the-mill question about writing, I floundered.

Here’s the problem: There is the book I want to write, and then there is the book I should write.

I am not talking trends; I am referring to tone and theme.  My passion is emotionally-driven YA contemporary.  As a well-trusted writing friend of mine once said:  “You don’t build relationships.  You take existing, fully-functioning relationships and tear them apart, toss you characters into a pit of despair  just so you can rebuild them.”  In a sense, she is not wrong.  The problem is, there is a narrow niche for that type of book.

Which brings me to the book I probably should write – the lighthearted YA contemporary that is infused with humor and a ton of awkward firsts.  I have thought about it, even have the plot worked out and the character set to roll.  I even went so far as to get the green light form my agent.  I could write it, probably have a decent first draft done by the beginning of July.  Problem is, I’d hate every second of writing it.  Let’s face it, those of who know me and/or writing can say without any reservation that I don’t do peppy or hopeful well;   desperate and despondent is more my style!

Now let me say if first because I know you are all thinking it.  You should write the book you want to write. And I agree, but . . .